gurrbonzo: what's WITH that!?

Friday, July 11, 2008

what's WITH that!?

What's with...

the baby on the box o Costco baby wipes? It's an otherwise cute baby with a creepy cabdriver toupee. Gross. You know I'm right.
the recent spike in African-investment spam I've been getting? "May I humbly introduce myself to your good self? I recognized associating with you will derive a huge success there, ten percentage."
people thinking Seriously, so blessed! is written by a guy. Seriously?? Come on!
harems in hip-hop videos? Just watched part of a documentary on that and it rocked, er, hip-hopped me. Skanktastic. One more reason hub, baby and I refuse to turn thug.
there not being a Tar-jay closer to my home??
our baby's huge, toothless grin. Call me a cheese all you want but it's the CUTEST EVER.
people hating Wall-E? No joke, I read a blog post recently in which someone claimed it was "the most offensive movie" they'd ever seen. Helluva statement to make about a ROBOT CARTOON, eh?? A little defensive about your trash?? And while I'm raging about that, what's with people acting like taking care of our planet is a bad thing? Ever heard of tending the earth? Politics or no politics, LOGIC tells me that smog is bad.
Chipotle not having a frequent stampy card?

Your turn.

13 comments:

Erin said...: i haven't really noticed the baby on the costco diaper wipes ... but i will look next time. what i have noticed is that all of the babies in joseph's "happy baby colors" book have major skin problems. i have nothing against baby acne, joseph had some for a bit, but seriously these pictures in the book are very unflattering and it makes me lose my appetite everytime i read it.; 8:52 PM
Anonymous said...: I love all those things! Hip hop, the Costco baby, Wall-E, and planet earth, Chipotle, the African investment spammers, your baby and Seriously so blessed. THAT'S what's with them.; 9:06 PM
Kristina P. said...: I truly believe that Seriously, So Blessed is written by a woman. There are too many intricacies of Mormon womanhood and culture for it to be a man, although, look at Sex and the City.

I also lack whimsy, so I haven't seen Wall-E.; 11:40 PM
KT said...: Did I really say we were too cute to go to law school? That was very snobby of me. Now you're going to be the rich, hot lawyer and I'm going to be...well, I'll let you know when I figure it out. Right now it has something to do with finances, but that could change at anytime. Man, I wish I had focus.; 6:38 AM
Anonymous said...: What's with sweatpits? UNAVOIDABLE.; 5:00 PM
WonderKitty said...: I can just picture you talking like Jerry Seinfeld right there. "What's with air-line food?"; 9:28 AM
WonderKitty said...: Oh, and I LOVED Wall-E and I also recycle.; 9:29 AM
Erin said...: you know, i think it's actually REALLY OFFENSIVE (more offensive than Wall-E) that everyone seems to think "seriously so blessed" is by a guy.

i interpret that to mean that people think that girls can't possibly be that funny or insightful. and perhaps that all girls are actually *like* that so of course one could not be *mocking* that. and that bugs.

i am willing to bet that SSB is a girl.; 12:29 PM
Lindsay said...: So Seriously Blessed has got to be written by a girl. Not a woman. Ugh. I hate that blog.; 8:52 AM
Anna said...: Whats up with old tan men refusing to wear shirts when mowing the lawn? And when I say old I mean any of them over the age of 40. You know the type, uber tan, beer bellies and those awful shorts... usually a bit too short for comfort. I mean my own comfort.; 3:38 PM
Kristina P. said...: Well, this answers the SSB male vs. female question.

http://www.sltrib.com/ci_9882695

The author is still remaining anoymous, but she's a 25 year-old woman, and a new mom.; 9:57 PM
Jules AF said...: If you read the articles that SSB has posted on the sidebar, it says she's a stay at home mom. YES! She totally helped me win an argument with a guy about that.
He told me that a girl couldn't be that funny in her writings. I almost wrote him out of my life because of it. All I had to say to him was, you're not that funny yourself! Don't be jealous!!; 10:59 AM
Lindsay said...: What the HELL?!? So Seriously Blessed and I are the same age??? How is THAT possible?; 11:20 PM

Quotable Quotes, or, tidbits from me life.

My professor, about people having their babies at home: Home delivery is for pizza.

Me, about Prof: I LIKE his wavelength; I'm just not on it.

Student: I don't think so.
(long pause).
Prof: No, you DO think so.

"I wish I had the opportunity to HAVE a sexual quality of life." -- student responding to survey

"I should cut up my credit cards.
(long pause)
Of course, then I would starve." -- Student

"Are you getting a manicure in my courtroom? What the hell are you doing?" Judge/Prof, to student clipping nails

"He covered everything but his 1990 colonoscopy. Good example of a bad speech. Everyone wants to go home, so unless you're awfully funny, keep it brief." -- Prof

"I'm not opposed to playing games. If you want to play solitaire, bring a deck of cards." -- Prof

"If you want to spend time with your young children, you have to do it when they're young." -- Chief Justice Roberts

Student: That doesn't jive very well with the second article of faith, punishing people for their parents' transgressions.
Prof: Yes, oh holy one.

"For expert witnesses, there are 2 requirements: must have gray hair, and must have hemorrhoids to convey the proper level of concern." -- Prof

"I represented a prostitute, and some of her activities were highly aerobic." -- Prof

"I lock my car. Do you know why? Because I have contraband." - - Prof

"You can either finish law school and write patents at home 1 hour a day, while your little one scribbles on the walls with permanent marker, or you can strap your baby to your back and wash floors with a dirty mop in the early morning and late evening. You decide." --Friend, telling me not to quit

"The children of lawyers who don't read footnotes will STARVE." -- Prof

"You know what’s great about a new day? It’s a new day, full of new opportunities for rejection. I mean, WHO KNOWS who might reject me today?” -- Student, about the job hunt.

"Every time I read an opinion by Justice Breyer, I think of ice cream, and then I want some." -- Student

"I don't want a job. I want a life plan. I need direction!" -- Student.

"They met at a Communist party get together. Not exactly the wardhouse, but still pretty romantic." -- Prof

"He thought he might be the father, because they had sort of an intimate relationship...well, not sort of." -- Prof

"The federal government appreciates love. They understand it." -- Prof

"You never tell your clients to lie. That's unethical. You say, 'Well, here is a potential, credible story that we hope is true.'" -- Prof

"When you get caught speeding, don't say 'I'm sorry.' Say, 'IF I was speeding, I am sorry.' ADMIT NOTHING." -- Prof

"It's true. You can google it on the Internet." -- Prof

"Let me give you a hypothetical. Jesus goes to law school, graduates, what does He do? Criminal prosecution or defense? That's right, he's defending these monsters. He's a defense attorney. That's my gospel insight for the day." -- Prof.

"This is my job. I'm just trying to do my job, and you're giving me a hard time. I don't give you a hard time with your job. I just order my burger and fries." -- Prof to smart alecky student

"It's just one more way he's found to shame me."
--Student, about Prof

"In a couple of days, you're going to wish this distinction didn't exist." --Prof

"I can't concentrate when it's snowing, dammit."
--Student, when asked a question in class

Prof: "And what did the court say about that?"
Student: "They didn't mention it."
(awkward pause)
Prof: "Actually, it's italicized. Hahaha!"

"Punitive damages are un-freaking-predictable, but it's the consumer's way of saying 'corporate America, you can't screw me over.'" -- Prof

"I'd like to reward attendance and good preparation, but it's a crapshoot, after all." --Prof, explaining grading policy

"I don't know if any of you have neighbors with vicious boars, but if you do, you should probably move." --Prof

Student A: The thing speaks for itself, don't you think?
Student B: Then I want to know what the hell it's saying.

Student: I would think so.
Prof: You would THINK so???
(awkward pause)
Student: But I would obviously be wrong.

"My wife tells me it's harder to actually give birth than to encourage someone to give birth." -- Prof

Student: I give up.
Prof: Actually, only I get to decide when you give up.

"I think most people who work for the government are lazy, because I've been to the post office." -- Student

"I made the mistake of going out to lunch. I've seen the sun. I've tasted freedom." -- Student

"Imaginable in a common sense sort of way, not imaginable in a science fiction sort of way." -- Prof

Prof: Ready? You've had 19 minutes to think about this.
Student: I know. I advanced a level on Warcraft.

"I know you hate me, because I made you read pages we didn't get to. I hate me too." -- Prof

"Don't go there. We have a chart on that that's gonna give you a rash." -- Prof

Prof: Passover is coming! Have you been thinking about it?
Student: No, Ive been busy preparing food for it all week.
Prof: Your excuse fails, because the law requires the lamb to be boiled not roasted, so it must be done quickly. Your excuse fails like the little boy who lost his CTR ring."

Student: Can you clarify consequential and incidental damages in this case? It's a little fuzzy.
Prof: Let's just not.

Prof: Now, I want to go back to this student, because he's the one that said thou shalt not kill.
Student: Well, God said that, I quoted it.

"An accumulation of bad choices will make you into a bad lawyer and therefore a bad person." -- Prof