Wednesday, October 22, 2008


I really recommend everyone spend a significant chunk of quality time with a 6 month old girl at least once in life because it's pretty great.

In other news, we had the great pleasure of going to see David Sedaris on Monday night and rejoiced not only because of the event, but bc the great people watching. We enjoyed guessing which woman sitting by us was anxious about her shift at the community garden, who rode their bikes there from the Avenues and is pissed the other chick wore the same keffiyeh, why the kid sitting alone didn't have the guts to invite his tattooed coffee shop crush, and which member of the hairy father/son adult combo in front of us had recently divorced. Unfortunately, the man next to me smelled like mussels. I want to be him (David Sedaris, not the musselman) but Mormon, heterosexual and fewer f-words.

On an unrelated note, Friday one of my law profs answered his phone in the middle of class with one of those blueteeth. I just wanted to make bluetooth plural. But, he really did, and I felt like I was in the twilight zone. I have another professor that says "err" as in "Ur." Correct or bizarre?

Sunday, October 19, 2008

deep, I know

Husband is recently hooked on getting CDs from the public library and it has really changed our home's tune environment. He brought home the "For the Kids" CD yesterday and I've had Cake's "Mahna Mahna" in my head ever since. Warning: if you click here to listen to it, you'll hum it all day and even when you want to slam your face into the sidewalk to get rid of it, you'll realize you're slamming it to the rhythm. Don't click. DON'T CLICK.

In other news, let's say you have a totally made-up calling that you start to resent. Is it ok to boycott it in silent yet meaningful protest? Discuss.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Ask the audience

How do you feel about someone clipping their nails at the public library?

Friday, October 10, 2008

grumble grumble

I'm guilty of blog neglect, I know, I know, but not due to lack of love for you and definitely not due to lack of material, if by material you mean gripe-age (I wrote gripage and realized it it looked like rhymes-with-rip instead of rhymes with ripe so hopefully the hyphen helps). And now for some griping...

I saw one of my least favorite people yesterday (not you...I LOVE YOU! You read my blog!), which is already bad enough by itself; in fact, she's the very woman who inspired most of these debbie downer run-ins but thankfully (because of something I consider a merciful act of God) we don't interact as much as we used to. Yesterday in our five minute encounter she managed to do the following:
  • said "Are you sure you can handle all THIS?" and pointed at my sleeping daughter, reminiscent of the recent inexplicably weird "THAT one" Papy McCain line. Where the crap does one take that conversation? "Nope. WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!" BEGIN MELTDOWN. Thanks for your faith in me, beeyotch.
  • asked if I was "still going with the whole law school thing," like a pathetically dogged maniac who's been rocking back and forth in the fetal position for 48 hours non-stop and everyone's wondering when I'll give it up and pass out or pull it together already.
  • began texting WHILE SPEAKING to me. I CAN SEE YOU. Don't make me stand there if you have something else to do because I sure as hell don't want to talk to you. (No offense...saying "no offense" is an automatic meanness-remover, right? RIGHT? Should I add a smiley to take the sting off?)
  • called me Katherine when she knows full well it's Kathleen.
Grumble grumble.

In other news, hub's a champ, I'VE HAD NO CLASS ALL WEEK, and to top things off, our kid sits up and laughs a lot and grabs my cheek and it kills me.

I wholeheartedly recommend reproduction.
I'm Gurrbonzo and I approved this message.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

pretty pumped

So one of the many perks of serving your mission at (quote fingers) historical sites (quote fingers), involves ALL THE OLD PEOPLE. Seriously. The number of senior citizens per capita there is pretty darn close to most rest homes, but with more agility and potato salad. Either way, one endearing old owlish woman who (of course) eerily resembled her endearing old owlish husband told me she could always tell when it was time for General Conference because her batteries were low and needed re-charging. She said, "Every now and again, I feel like something's missing, just a little more tired, or grumpy, or a little extra impatient, and I'll look at the calendar and sure enough, conference is right around the corner." Though she always said "in-patient" instead of "impatient." Anyway, I couldn't relate but laughed politely and then looked at pics of her great-grandkids and listened politely as she told me (again) to store water in soda bottles, NOT milk cartons bc the milk never gets rinsed out all the way and lit up when she lectured me on the variation involved in yarn textures and the latest family history software.

Anyway, I didn't get it. Maybe it's just bc I'm stretched thin these days (figuratively, not MY figure-atively) with the thirty plates I'm spinning (can I climb the ladder of mixing metaphors a little harder?!...bahahaha). Maybe it's just with trying to be a semi-competent parent and wife and almost-lawyer, I need a nap. Maybe I'm just ready for another Julie Beck pep talk since her comments at the law school were right on the money. Maybe it's just the fact that I'm a little nuts but man, I'm spent, and frankly a little weary. So, I'm excited for conference in a way I haven't been before and I see what the sweet owl grandma's charge-up-these-batteries-already comments are all about.

Is it bad to say "hit me" about conference?