Thursday, January 31, 2008

Thoughts & Feelings

Dear bloggy, sorry I've neglected you. When I go this long without a post, it means I have a slew of random thoughts piled up in my head just ready for me to word vomit on out. Blllleeeeeeecccchh...

  • Know what's funny? I have had a lot of rage lately over really dumb things. Not road rage (though I did observe a mediation yesterday in which one of the parties said (direct quote) "I have road rage coming out of my butt." What does that even mean?) but just rage in general, and I think part of that is because I do too many school things. So I am working on delegating and the rage is already subsiding...out my butt. Whatever that means.
  • Sometimes I bombard people. Come on, I'm not that intense, but sometimes I overwhelm people, and watching them get overwhelmed is just weird enough for me to freak myself out but just funny enough that I can't quite stop. Why does this happen?
  • We're taking a hypnobirthing class, and just the title cracks me up. I keep calling it our "childbirth" class so people won't know that I'm a hippie, but turns out, I am kind of a hippie, and I just don't think that can stay a secret forever. I don't really get what it will be about though, AND I don't really get childbirth, and I don't really get kids. Basically I don't know what I'm getting into but I think I just might really like it. Sometimes I just stare at my belly and watch it move and I love it.
  • From a recent class (which yes, is at the law school, even though it sometimes feels like 8th grade health mixed with D.A.R.E. bc we talk about communication and self-esteem) I took a communication-style quiz and learned that sometimes, I actually prefer interrupters. Bc I am an interrupter, and when people interrupt me I enjoy it because it makes me feel like they're engaging, and when they don't, I end up thinking they're boring when really they're just polite. This is part of why I overwhelm people, because I prefer high-energy conversations uber-full of interrupting one another. Is it possible to e-interrupt? Point to ponder. Either way, I just learned this about myself and keep thinking about it and how it's right on the money.
  • Are people still seriously mixing up dessert and desert? There is a big sign at the grocery store above some gloves and beanies that says "Dessert gear" and it reminds me why they still do those jr. high exercises about the differences between "sit" and "set" used in a sentence, even though no one I know mixes them up.
  • There is a sign in one of the bathrooms at the law school that cracks me up each day:
"Need a quieter place to study? Try the 4th floor reading room, where silence is strictly enforced."

First of all, why is this sign in the bathroom? Are people studying in the bathroom and finding it too noisy? And what do you mean, STRICTLY enforced? Forceful shushing? Corporal punishment? Italics? Wtf, man. If you need a quieter place to study, go home or put in some freaking earplugs. Also, it's 2008. They have HEADPHONES now.

Thursday, January 24, 2008


So, this morning my alarm went off and the first thing I thought about was how to stay in bed. I don't mean just five more minutes from the heaven-sent snooze button. I was thinking about ways to ditch all commitments and remain under the covers indefinitely. A few of my thoughts went as follows:

Sure, I have three classes today, but they are lame, and the school is a freaking hour away which feels longer on a cold morning, and they don't all take roll, and I haven't missed yet...of course, it's only week 3 of the semester, but whatever.
Food. Mmm. Food. Think how disappointing it would be to go through the trouble of getting up now that I'm running too late to have a good breakfast. Plus, I forgot to pack a lunch and now I don't have time so I can't even look forward to that. Come on Gurrbonzo, snap out of it, get out of bed, there's more to life than your lunch. It's cold out because it's winter, you can't stay in bed all winter unless you want to become an embarrassing slug. You want your kid to have a slug for a mother? Okay, I'm mostly responsible, and there's a meeting at noon I have to go to, but I could totally be sick, and besides there is a little tickle in my throat (insert fake cough) pansy, pull it together...but I don't want to, and what's the purpose of life if you don't get to do what you want?

This inner debate continued for ten minutes until my responsible self finally dragged my pansy self out of bed and ran out the door, disorganized and tired and hungry but proud of myself for persevering. Once I made it to the blasted bus, I gave up reading after a few minutes and dozed off into the peaceful , stale-smelling oblivion that only public transportation can provide. I woke up an hour later, nowhere near the law school, to everyone shuffling off the bus because it broke down.

I therefore missed my first class. Don't you think this means my pansy self was right all along and I should've stayed in bed?? The moral of the story: when you feel uber lazy, don't fight it. Embrace it as a sign from the heavens.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008


So apparently I've been living under a rock by not climbing on the Lost train until now. Husband's brother gave him all three seasons for his birthday, and if you're wondering if we watched TWELVE EPISODES this weekend, the answer is yes.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

or something

Today I had to go gulp some nasty orange drink a la 1980s McDonald's with triple the carbonation for some sort of glucose test to make sure baby and I don't have diabetes (or as husband likes to say, "live-abetes," because there's no need to use such negative language), and then I had to hang out for an hour, then have a couple needles poked in my arm to test my orange-drink-ridden blood.

Well, nice, clever Mr. Phlebotomist pretended he had the shakes when he was putting my tourniquet on and then proceeded to get all chatty with me. Our conversation proceeded as follows:

Phlebotomist: So, what do you do for a living?
Me: I'm a law student.
Phlebotomist: Cool. So you're like a lawyer's assistant or something?
Me: No, I'm in law school.
Phlebotomist: So you're going to be a paralegal? That's cool.
Me: No, I'm in school to be a lawyer.
Phlebotomist: Like, real lawyers will let you help them?

Do you think I'd be more successful at avoiding this problem if I started calling it "real lawyer school"?

Monday, January 14, 2008

Did you know...?

...that I slept so hard on the bus this morning that I woke up confused and startled the person next to me, who gasped and looked at me in a panic?

...that BYU blocks Youtube? Seriously.

...that I use the term "up in my business" 3-5 times per day, for uses as varied as "Wow, you parked awfully close to that guy, you're right up in his business" and "Why you up in my business about what we had for dinner?"

...that "go hang a salami i'm a lasagna hog" is a palindrome?

...that I wish I drank coffee on days like today?

...that this guy hid 34 marijuana joints in his undies and got caught when they frisked his bum at the airport?

Don't do drugs. Just a few things to be aware of.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Our Next President

So it's no secret I'm pretty sold on Barack Obama, who is about to take this country by storm, turn the page, bring hope, usher in a new era, insert other cliche here...say what you will, he's the real deal. And I'll be honest in admitting that my enthusiasm comes not from in-depth analysis of his specific policy views (about which I know very little) but from the respect I have for him personally from reading "Dreams From My Father" and watching him in action. Just how he talks to people and how he talks about the future puts me in a good mood, and his wife is a powerhouse, and if that's fluffy support, so be it. But husband just showed me a link, and I was interested to see that without even knowing it, I am in "88% substantive agreement" with Obama after answering a few short questions about my views.

Give it a try.

I'm closest to Obama, furthest from Fred--blech--Thompson. How about you?

Note: the proper link explaining the false/absurd email floating around about Obama is right here.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

"Slice of life"

Be nice to your spouse or significant other. This is not only an inherently good idea, but will help you avoid the following situation, which I just read about for Wills & Estates. From 1993:

A man who was nagged by his wife to stop smoking has left her everything---but only if she takes up his habit as punishment for 40 years of "hell." Marin Cemenescu, who died last week at age 76, stipulated in his will that to inherit his house and $30,000 estate, his 63-year-old wife Aneta must smoke five cigarettes a day for the rest of her life.
"She could not stand to see me with a cigarette in my mouth, and I ended up smoking in the bathroom like a schoolboy," he wrote in his will. "My life was hell."

Sunday, January 06, 2008


A week in the land of perpetual rainbows and nice sunburns is enough to do any pregnant frump a world of good. Highlights of our Maui adventure include becoming BFF with some whales, a LOT of fantastic people watching, some ridiculous light reading, many games of Clue, and WAY too much food, along with plenty o family quality time, gas and laughs. And if you're wondering if I got a bug bite in the middle of my forehead, the answer is yes. I thought about moving to Hawaii til I realized they don't need lawyers there because THERE ARE NO PROBLEMS IN PARADISE. Anyway, since I'm frazzled from the red-eye, here's a little unrelated something for you to enjoy til I can blog again like a sane person instead of a sun-ravaged beast whose hair still smells like sunscreen mixed with the airport.